Raisin’ Kids is like Being Plucked to Death by Chickens

Welcome, all!

Bear Cabin was cracked open Easter Sunday after a long winter’s sleep. My husband and I let the Son shine in.

Along with the wonderful message of our Risen Savior, we welcomed over thirty adults and five little people up on the Roan for a wonderful celebration; it was so good to see family members, neighbors and friends join together for a day of fellowship, fun, and laughter.

Tony and I had let our two decorators, Hope Hall and Patti Mullins of Plumberry Hollow -see Does This Bathroom Make My Butt Look Big?- give the front porch of the cabin a new facelift while leaving the back porch rustic with bear rugs and Indian motif. That way we knew we would please everyone’s idea of what an old cabin nestled in the woods should look like.

The Easter Bush had been decorated with colored eggs, and Mr. and Mrs. Rabbit and their three little ones were standing beside it ready to greet our guests as they walked up the lane to the cabin.  Though the Bush was stark naked this year, not even wearing a bud, she still looked festive and held within her the promise of beauty that would eventually bloom.

As everyone arrived and spilled throughout the cabin and onto the porches, the excitement of seeing one another grew louder, and peals of laughter started ringing throughout Misty Hollow.

One of the first things to be done was to show everyone a huge Easter basket filled with goodies and a quart-sized jar of jelly beans. The one who guessed how many beans were in the jar without going over would win the basket.

Laughing hysterically, I was amazed how many of the guys started pulling out their smartphones trying to figure out how much dry goods a quart jar could hold, the area of a quart jar vs. the size of a jelly bean and other such 'scientific angles.' They were all over the map with their answers. The women all simply picked up the jar, turned it around a couple of times and wrote down their answers. The children? Bless their Lil’ hearts. They each guessed fervently but innocently…and way, way low.

We had so many other wonderful plans for the day. The hot tub had been drained and cleaned for spring, and it was waiting at the perfect temperature; the miniature donkeys that had new babies were anxious to nuzzle the guests and be brushed, and the four-wheeler was finely tuned for spins around the perimeter of the property.

And it goes without saying Trig, my Tennessee Walker, was chomping at the bit to join in the fray and receive his pre-packaged bags of treats (to avoid colic) handed out to all who wanted to become his best buddy. Trig is so gentle with the little folk, and he even took a bit of carrot out of his mom’s lips to the delight of on watchers.

It took no time at all before three of our younger grandchildren, Savannah, Ryleigh, and Emmett had donned wading boots and left to venture up the creek to explore for treasures, one of their favorite things to do while at Nana’s and Poppas.

                              

When the dinner bell rang loud and clear… the blessing of the food was given by my sweetheart, and it was time to fill an Easter plate and find a place at a picnic table.

                   

                              

This lovely bowl of potato salad was made and brought to the picnic by my awesome sister, Debby. She is renowned for her home-style cooking. Just to help you put amounts in perspective…this bowl holds two gallons! The two matching bowls each held two gallons of cole slaw and baked beans. Also, there were one hundred pieces of chicken served. We were determined no one would leave our home hungry!

A real highlight of the meal came when dessert was announced. We had ole-fashioned banana splits with all the trimmings, compliments of Aunt Peggy, Uncle Edd, and Grandfather Don! What a treat!

As everyone began to gather ‘round the table laden with gallons of ice cream, fresh bananas, and arrays of toppings and whip cream you could hear the oohs and ahhs.  As I put that first bite in my mouth, I recalled the first time as a young child I had my first banana split. I guess it will always be at the top of my list of favorite desserts.   

Soon it was time for the big Easter Egg Hunt. The older kids took off to the front of the cabin to hide the dozens of eggs that were meant for the grade school kid’s baskets. One-year-old Bowie had his own special eggs to find.

We even found one pretty pink Easter egg over in the field by itself.

Throughout the day up here in our hollow, love was vibrant and precious. The love of Christ and His sacrifice for us was ever near; young love was in bloom that brought back memories of Tony and me at that tender age so long ago.

    

It was also touching throughout the day to see such moments as the bond of love between a father and daughter and a favored uncle and adoring niece.

      

Laughter and shouts of children playing indicated all were having a great time. The hilarity when the winner of the Easter basket was announced was priceless. Angela, Tony’s sister, won!  She was one of the women who gave a casual glance at the jar and wrote her number down.The angst of the men when not one of them came in second, third, fourth or fifth place in the contest was savored.  Sometimes ya just need to observe the female folk and glean from their wisdom of keeping life simple.

As all were starting down the lane leaving the cabin on Sunday, I stood on the porch and sadly watched each go. My own adult children walked closely with their children as others walked with theirs; the day was over, but it had been wonderful.

Yep, I thought as I headed toward a hot bath, raisin’ kids is as has been said 'like being plucked to death by chickens.' That sentiment is surely based on the times of sorrow that come with the job. The heartaches of broken bones and wounded hearts, of training up a child and the inevitable rebellion and consequences that came with it. The disappointments that hurt us as parents as much as our kids. Those times of tears over wounds we knew would heal one day, but each child felt never would; when our tears flowed as freely as theirs. I know these heartaches seemed endless with my four children.

Nevertheless, as I watched mine leave Sunday, I realized there have been countless days before Sunday that blessed and reminded me how much it was all worth it. My prayer now is that those same chickens don’t come home to roost as my children are rearin’ theirs... my precious grandchildren.

I hope your Easter was as blessed as ours, my friends.

Love Came to the Rescue

 This story is dedicated to all women who have had to make a choice. Faced with a crisis pregnancy and knowing you could not care for your baby…you made the most difficult, yet noble, decision any mommy could make. You placed your child into the arms of another mother.   

Halfway across the world in South Korea, a young woman was distraught when she discovered she was going to have a baby. Her boyfriend was ill-equipped to be a father and keeping the child seemed impossible. 

This girl’s mother was very supportive and assisted her daughter in the decision to give the child she carried up for adoption. The baby was brought to term and was born on 07/07/07. Isn’t seven God’s number of completeness and perfection? 

As you follow this story, it may seem so in the lives of those involved in this birth.

When the child was born, this mother held her little girl close to her heart and named her Sarang, meaning Love. 

Then this incredible woman did one of the noblest things anyone can do. She placed her child in the arms of another with her only comfort being she was giving her baby a chance at a better life, one she could never provide. 

Then walking away, she knew she would have that little one forever in her heart.  

Sarang was then placed in a nurturing foster home in Seoul with a mother and father who had children of their own.

                

Now on the opposite side of this earth in the town of Hendersonville, a bedroom community of Nashville, Tennessee, lived a handsome couple named Tara and Ken Tolbert who had a young son, Chandler. My husband and I are so proud to know and love Tara as our daughter, Ken, our son-in-law, and Chandler, our first born grandchild. 

This little family was very happy and spent their days filled to the brim with their son who, since pre-kindergarten, loved soccer. Tara and Ken spent many long hours supporting and encouraging Chandler on the soccer fields in addition to the other interests he pursued. Their lives were full and content.   

                          

Eventually, though, all three began to yearn for an addition to their family. Much reflection resulted in the realization they wanted to adopt a child from another country. Chandler wanted a brother or a sister. As a family who had already experienced the rich rewards and blessings of having adoptees from abroad, Tara and Ken also wanted to go in the direction of their aunt and uncle.

My husband's sister, Peggy Blevins Baldock and her husband, Edd, had adopted two beautiful babies, Mary and Victoria, from China years prior.

Plus, Tara and Ken recalled having International students living in their home had been an excellent experience.

Thus the arduous task of the adoption process began.

It took over a year but finally, the endless piles of paperwork and office and home interviews were complete, and the wait began. Now all they could do was pray that God would bring to them the child who was a perfect match for their family. They also wanted to be a perfect match for the child who had needs they could meet.

Time seemed to crawl.Then one day the call came that there was a baby girl in South Korea who was four months old and needed a forever family. The agency shared some details, and an appointment was scheduled to review her file the following day.  

On Halloween 2006, there was the final signing of the papers and details were set in motion for Sarang to become their child! Over the next five months, more information about her first months of life with the foster family was made available, and a complete health history was laid bare along with the brief biography of the child's parents.

Not only were Tara, Ken, and Chandler thrilled, but our entire extended family were beside themselves with excitement and could not wait for Sarang's arrival.

The soon-to-be parents immediately began the preparations for The Homecoming. Tara launched a study of everything she could find regarding the Korean culture. In honor of the new baby’s arrival, a shower was a must. Deciding that Sarang should have a new name more conducive to her life in America, the fun began to choose one that Ken, Tara, and Chandler all agreed on. 

They finally fell in love with Ryleigh Emerson Tolbert. This name won out for many reasons, but the best was because the first, middle and last names all had seven letters; that number seven seemed such a perfect number.

                            

After what seemed like forever, the BIG DAY finally arrived! Tara and Ken flew to Detroit, Michigan where a private escort brought Ryleigh from South Korea and placed her in the arms of her new mommy and daddy. Then a flight back to the Nashville airport was made where Granddaddy Tony and Nana Linda were there with Chandler, waiting eagerly to meet them. 

While waiting for the plane to land, the new big brother, then eleven years old, proudly held up his sign for his sister so she could see it when she came through the door. Those passing were stopping and asking the young boy about his sign. Chandler did not hesitate to tell them who was flying in to meet him. With pride, I held my sign high as well.

                                  

                                     

The overwhelming joy when Tara and Ken walked through that airport door with Ryleigh in their arms was indescribable. That little tyke, as she approached, was flashing a smile so dazzling it lit up her entire face. Ryleigh also threw that smile to everyone passing by as her new family members stood oohing and ahhing over her. Her raven black hair, coal black eyes and skin tone were shockingly beautiful; she also boasted such a beautiful bone structure.

Our family quickly returned to Hendersonville to introduce this precious baby to her new home and the welcome party awaiting her.  When this precious baby saw the decorated living room, that smile never left her face as her eyes gazed at the balloons, signs, and flowers.

                    

                              

And then Mommy, Daddy, and big brother were able, after what seemed a lifetime, to start that first day of loving and living with the answer to their prayers. They even blessed Nana and Papaw by letting us share in their love.

  

Our precious Ryleigh comfortably settled in and immediately began to thrive.

                     

And she grew by leaps and bounds.

                                  

As she grew physically, we began to see more of her other delightful traits.

                                

Ryleigh rapidly became a treasure and delight to both her parents, her brother and her extended family who understood how blessed we were she had been woven into our tapestry of life.

                                              

                                             

Ryleigh today has a charming personality and early on showed she was a very affectionate child. She is now eight-years-old and has two favorite toys, her two cousins, Savannah, age seven and Emmett, nine, and the three are inseparable. The parents of these two cousins are always more at ease when their kids are under the 'protective' oversight of Ryleigh. 

It is because Ry is known to be more cautious by nature, levelheaded and she instinctively draws respect from both of her buds. It is also well established that this child has been known to pull the other two back from the brink when they devise a wild scheme. 

                                        

Never shy, kindergarten and each subsequent grade have been easy for this young breath of fresh air, and Tara and Ken have shared that making friends comes as natural to her as breathing. Tara observed this stems from Ryleigh's big smile, confidence and her love for all.  

Showing love for cute clothes from an early age, dressing up and striking poses delighted this kid!  The time finally came when her mom asked if she had an interest in modeling. Ohhhhh yes! So an agent was secured, and doors have been opened for modeling and commercials through her agent and other venues.  Each audition, whether she lands the gig or not, brings great life lessons in which her parents feel far exceeds any role.   

Has this hobby turned my granddaughter into a prima donna? Not hardly. Ryleigh also enjoys coming up to Misty Hollow and wearing mud with her Nana.

From an early age, dancing and singing have been a delight to that young soul of hers. As always, her mom and dad want her to at least have the opportunity to try in any appropriate endeavor she chooses. If she fails, she will learn from it. If she doesn't, she will learn from that as well. That had been Tara, and Ken's creed with Chandler and the same applies to their daughter.

Getting to dance with the Nashville Ballet in their rendition of 'The Nutcracker' at the Tennessee Performing Arts Center was thrilling for the entire family when the notification came that our dancer made the final cut. The Blevins' clan all drove to Nashville to see her in her performance, another great life experience.  

                             

 As an eight-year-old, this kid's favorite shows are Cupcake Wars and anything on HGTV. She loves to go in the kitchen and pull out all her mother's cooking utensils and ingredients and concoct something delicious. Ryleigh loves to work on various home projects as well.

And recently our little go-getter decided she would like to pursue theater and she joined a company a few weeks ago. Ryleigh just learned she would have a solo in an upcoming production.   

My goodness, this child has showered a lot of happiness upon our family, and we are all blessed as a result of her being a part of us. It is a miracle to see Tara, Ken, and Chandler and their lives with Ryleigh and her's with them.

Now. You may have wondered why I let you take a peek into the two different worlds of the two families I have laid before you today. The story of each is true; the heartbreak and joy are both real as well.

But please listen, my friends. I would have failed miserably in my writing if you were unable to grasp there are no babies in this world who are unwanted. 

Millions of mommies and daddies are out there somewhere praying for Ryleigh's and Raylan's, Victoria's and Mary's. It just takes courage for the women in that crisis pregnancy who realizes she cannot keep her child to open her heart, reach out and let go, just like that precious young woman in South Korea. 

Without her, our baby would not now be in the arms of this forever grateful mommy.